Keeping Your Husband On the Edge As a general rule, you will elicit the best behavior from your husband if you keep him on the edge between frustration and satisfaction. You absolutely do not want to frustrate your husband. If your husband becomes sexually frustrated, he will be tempted to seek relief outside the marriage. On the other hand, you do not want to entirely satisfy him either. A husband who is sexually satisfied will have no energy to attend to your needs. Finding that balance is tricky but as a rule of thumb, watch for irritability as a sign of the lower bound and laziness as a sign of the upper bound. When a man is not getting enough sex he will become irritable and distracted. If you find yourself in such a situation, give your husband constructive tasks and then satisfy him upon successful completion. To avoid oversatisfying your husband sexually, you can give him sexual gestures that arouse him without satisfying him. But if you find yourself in a situation where he has become lazy and inattentive you will have no choice but to simply pull back and wait for time to have its effect. Frequent sexual gestures during the day are the best way of rewarding your husband. Upon completion of even the most trivial task, express your appreciation with a deep, erotic kiss or a press of your hand against his crotch. This will at once reward him and build excitement within him. After your husband has been trained to attend to your needs, you will want to reserve his sexual satisfaction to the end of the day. Throughout the day, you should be giving him sexual gestures when he does the right thing. These gestures serve both to associate the behavior with sex thereby reinforcing it as well as to arouse him to further efforts on your behalf. At the end of the day, if you decide that he has performed adequately, you can allow him to satisfy you sexually. And then to satisfy himself. Interrogating Your Husband Men are generally very closed and secretive particularly where their emotions are concerned. Most men would rather brave death than admit their weaknesses and failures even to their wife. But if you are to truly dominate your husband, you must breach his emotional defenses and get him to open up to you. When you get him to open up you will 1) learn more about how he thinks and what he feels preparing you better to dominate him, and 2) erode his resistance to your domination. The psychology of the male is such that to the more successfully you penetrate his emotional defenses, the more he will feel at your mercy. A good routine to have with your husband is to allocate time at the very end of the day when you are both in bed for a conversation. In this daily conversation, you will explore his innermost thoughts and feelings. You should begin with relatively minor matters, things that perhaps you have never discussed but which might be slightly embarrassing to him. Only after you have been in the routine for several weeks should you begin to probe more deeply into subjects that he finds difficult to discuss. For example, you might begin by asking if he's ever bought a porn magazine or visited a porn site. Later you might ask about his lustful feelings toward other women or whether he has ever thought about cheating on you, or ever did. In these discussions, your attitude should be one of interested detachment. Avoid both consoling and criticizing but focus instead on getting to the truth of the matter in a clinical, objective manner. When he makes a genuine revelation to you, repeat back what he said and thank him for revealing it to you. Even the most submissive husband will not naturally open up in this way. The best way to encourage his cooperation is to manually stroke his penis during the conversation. With a dab of lubrication, while he is lying flat on his back, take his penis in your hand and gently begin to stroke it as you ask questions of your husband. If he hesitates or resists, slow or even stop the stroking. If he is entirely uncooperative, turn your back to him and go to sleep. But when your husband responds openly to these questions, increase the rate of stroke. In this way you can elicit his cooperation in the conversation. At the end, if he has been cooperative, you should allow him to satisfy you sexually and then himself. Ultimately, you should use these sessions to better understand your husband both in terms of his history and his daily moods. For example, if he was testy or angry during the day, push him to talk about what made him that way. Get him in the habit of telling you everything, everyday. Extracting Promises Promises are an important aspect of relationships in general but marriage in particular. A promise is a verbal declaration in which your husband binds himself to do, or to forbear to do, a specified act. It is a declaration which gives you a right to expect or to claim the performance or forbearance of that specified act. Husbands are naturally more attentive to their wives when they are aroused and excited. There is much you can do to maintain your husband in a state of arousal and excitement but such excitement is in anticipation of sexual satisfaction. Once that satisfaction is achieved, his attention to you will tend to fall off for a while. This is just natural. Promises are useful because they bind your husband at one time to perform at another time. In particular, your husband may make a promise when he is horny to perform when he is not. Your goal, then, is two-fold: First, you need to extract promises from your husband when he is most excited. Second, you need to remind him of the promises he has made and those he has broken. The best time to extract promises is during foreplay. When your husband anticipates that sexual satisfaction is imminent, he will do or say anything. When extracting promises, directness is best. Just before allowing him to enter you, tell him what you wish of him and ask him to promise. You can combine interrogation techniques with promise extraction to powerful effect. As one wife wrote: He did everything I asked, but the diner didn't taste as it was supposed to taste. After he did the dishes and gave me several orgasms (orally), I masturbated him while we had a little "talk". I asked him if he loves me. He said that he worshiped me and that he would do anything to please me. Then I asked him if he would take cooking lessons to make me very good meals. He hesitated a moment and I began to stroke his penis more intensively. He finally said: "I will take lessons to cook you meals that you deserve". It's amazing how he behaves when I'm masturbating him. He's very like a little boy; he stares at my hand like there was nothing else in the world. Naturally, when the urgency is passed, he will tend to forget his promises. To the extent that he is a man of his word, this will be less of a problem but you should expect him to fail to keep his promises from time to time. Additionally, he may rationalize that the promise was made under duress so it is best to keep a sense of humor about these promises. Still, it is very important not to let him slide but to frequently remind him of his promises especially when he breaks them. Take such broken promises in stride and avoid nagging. Instead, the time to make an issue of broken promises is during sex. When you are having sex again, remind him of the promises he has broken and ask him to repeat his promises and to promise to keep his promises. If the breaking of promises is relatively minor and the sincerity to correct sincere, then a renewed promise should be accepted. If the breaking of promises is more serious or persistent then some remediation or penance should be required before sex. Additionally, sex may be delayed for a discussion of the broken promises. This delay might be minutes, hours, or even days according to the circumstances. Power Grip When you are making important statements to your husband you should assume the power grip. In the power grip you hold his penis gently in one hand while you hold his testicles firmly in the other. The position itself will demand his full attention. Additionally you can alternate between giving pain and discomfort depending on the point you are trying to make. --------------------------- ONElist Sponsor ---------------------------- Win a Digital Camera and Earn 6 Percent APY Interest! SFNB is reinventing Internet Banking with a 6 percent APY Interest Checking acct. 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